These days there are many approaches to Valentine’s Day.
The No Approach: Ignore Valentine’s Day and act like it is any other day of your life. Who cares about red and pink?
The Sappy Approach: Flowers, cards, chocolates, teddy bears.. the works.
The Mature Relationship Approach: Exchanging cards and making dinner together that you will eat by candle light.
The Friend’s With Benefits Approach: Lets put on some red lingerie and pretend we are in love for a night… Don’t expect me to call you tomorrow.
The Best Friends Approach: I DON’T NEED A SIGNIFICANT OTHER I HAVE MY GIRLFRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS.
Within all these approaches there is a need for Band Aids. If you take the No Approach with your girlfriend, you might get punched in the face and need a Band Aid to hold the cut on your cheek closed until you can get stitches. If you take the Sappy Approach, you have a high chance of cuts from either a) the sappy cards, b) the cardboard on the candy box, or c) thorns on the roses you bought for her. In the Mature Relationship Approach you’ll most likely end up slicing a finger while cutting veggies because you’re so distracted by your beautiful mature girlfriend. In the Friend’s With Benefits Approach you may do something kinky resulting in injury. And lastly in the Best Friend’s Approach you’ll most likely get drunk and smack your head on something/break a wine glass and need a Band Aid for the battle wounds.
No matter how you spend this Valentine’s Night or what approach you take, be safe, folks.
My Dear Band Aid,
I feel that our relationship has plateaued. You are sticking around too long and I need to move on. I need to be independent and free to find myself, and you are just too clingy for that to happen. You need to give me some room to breathe. I feel you are taking advantage of my flaws and using them to your advantage to stay in my life.
So this is it Band Aid. We are finished. I am ripping you off and throwing you in the trash. I will learn to take pride in my open wounds and to stand strong against your power over me. I will survive.
When I was little a trip to Grammy’s was the highlight of the season. I got to go Spring Break, Summer Break, Thanksgiving and Christmas. As I got older I was dropped off halfway between home and Grammy’s to spend my Spring and Summer trips by myself in Charlottesville with her.
Now, everything that went on at Grammy’s house was AWESOME. There was always a chocolate cake waiting on the kitchen table for me, her old square dance skirts for me to play dress up in (yes, she was a champion square dancer around town), and best of all.. the Minnie Mouse Band Aids that had been in that medicine cabinet as long as I could remember.
These were no ordinary Minnie Mouse Band Aids. These were literally from 1992 or before. They came in a tin Band Aid’s can (the same size as a Band Aids box these days, just tin) and were a little different of a material from the Band Aids at home. I used to find any excuse to use one, but only one, during each trip. I knew they were special and I wanted them to last until I was “too old for them” (little did I know I would still be buying Barbie and Spider Man Band Aids 10+ years later).
The tin is still there, sans Minnie Mouse contents, and I can only hope my Grandkids will get to enjoy it too.
Every seen a teenager cut their finger?
Ever seen a young adult cut their finger?
What do these all have in common? THEY REQUIRE A BAND AID. But let’s not stop there. If given the choice between a plain Band Aid or a character Band Aid the most common choice is going to be a character Band Aid.. regardless of age.
Who cares if I am 20 years old. I want a Spider Man Band Aid. My 23 year old sister wants a Hello Kitty. My 82 year old Grammy wants a Spongebob Squarepants Band Aid.
No matter how old we get, we always enjoy a little piece of childhood every now and then, and sometimes the best kind is in the form of a Band Aid.
A Toast to You Band Aid.
Here’s to the time I tried to show my Girl Scout Troop the flips I learned in gymnastics and face planted into the floor. You were there to hold my chin together until I arrived at the hospital to get stitches.
Here’s to the time my sister pushed me off the swing set at the neighbors house… Too bad you don’t stick to busted lips.
Here’s to the time I was going lightening speed on my bike and took too sharp a turn. You were there to soothe my forehead until my mom was assured it was just a surface scrape and that I did not have a concussion.
Here’s to you, for being there for my knees in the summer time. I don’t think I would still have those puppies if it weren’t for you.
Here’s to the time I was doing a flip off the diving board and you were there for my leg. I should have learned my lesson with flips by then…
Here’s to the time I was walking to the grocery store last year and took a tumble and scraped my knee. You awaited me on the shelves of Giant like a trusty old pal.
Here’s to the time I was making mozzarella cubes for my pasta last semester, you were right there in my medicine cabinet when I cut myself.
Thank you Band Aid for being there for me at any age, for I will never grow out of hurting myself.
One of the funniest blogs ever, “Hyperbole and a Half”, features Band Aid in their Christmas Post. Click through and enjoy!
(Obviously since I didn’t create this it’s all for fun and not for grading)